Everything in this world is possible, but you can make possible thing impossible by saying that I can’t do that this is not possible or this is impossible and at the other end if you say that I can do that this is possible not impossible, then you can actually achieve your Target.
By : Fasih ur Rehman
Just a few years ago, I was crying myself to sleep every night, assuming this was what everyone did. Most mornings, it was a struggle to get out of bed. After my doctor diagnosed me with clinical depression, I realized that what I felt wasn’t just me. It didn’t have to be that way.
That isn’t to say that my eureka moment was all it took to heal my depression. I still struggled to combat my inner demons, and it took time and concerted effort to change my life for the better. But that mental shift was the first step. It empowered me to stop being a spectator in my life, and take control of my future.
One step at a time, I moved towards healthier alternatives, cut ties with negative people, and removed myself from unhealthy environments. I quit my corporate job, stopped using drugs, and began the slow process of turning my inner critic into an inner supporter.
Instead of focusing on what wasn’t working, I began to shift my awareness to gratitude, appreciating the small, seemingly unimportant things in my life. I made it my mission to fall in love with myself and my life. The first step in this process is awareness. I had already become aware that things could be different. I then had to familiarize myself with the specific criticisms I was prone to feeling towards myself. Only after recognizing my triggers and my unhealthy coping mechanisms could I replace the negative feedback with positive.
Over time, I replaced any self-criticism with self-affirmation. For example, the extra weight I ridiculed myself for my whole life became a signal of my financial blessings and my comfortable life. Instead of focusing on the areas where I was lacking, I chose to feel gratitude for everything I have.
By appreciating what was, I felt more grounded, hopeful, and happy. And I realized that being happy isn’t just an end in itself. It’s the cause of so many more wonderful things. Happiness is choosing to see life with an open mind. It’s being available for the lessons that present themselves to us. It’s showing up despite difficult circumstances.
And, by doing these things, you invite grace into your life. The more consistently you choose happiness, the more you’ll begin to see things change for the better — in ways might not ever have expected. Here are a few of the ways choosing happiness has changed my life.
1. I wake up feeling connected to the universe, excited for the day ahead, and open to whatever life has in store for me.
2. I have increased stores of patience and find it easier to maintain my composure in difficult situations.
3. I am free from constant worry. I feel confident in divine timing and relaxed in the knowledge that everything is always in the proper order.
4. I no longer recognize problems as anything other than opportunities for solutions.
5. I have regained my faith in people. I assume the best, rather than the worst.
6. I’ve stopped seeing forgiveness as a defeat or a conciliation. I recognize it as an act of strength and self-preservation.
7. I can honor my own needs without feeling guilty for sometimes putting myself first.
8. I am secure in who I am, and no longer a slave to the opinions of others.
“Being happy doesn’t mean that everything is perfect. It means you’ve decided to look beyond the imperfections.”
Nothing is gained by pushing the river, for the water ultimately arrives at the sea in its own perfect time…
If you always look toward tomorrow for happiness, odds are you will do the same when you attain what you’ve been dreaming of. As strange it sounds, the ability to appreciate what’s in front of you has nothing to do with what you actually have. It’s more about how you measure the good things in your life at any given time.
Practice wanting what you have and it will feel even sweeter when you eventually have what you want. Look around—what’s in front of you that you can enjoy?
Dr. Dacher Keltner of the University of California claims she can predict a person’s future by judging the strength of their smile. Researchers examined yearbook photos of 111 female students taken between 1958 and 1960.
Subsequent tests revealed that the women who expressed more positive emotion in those photos became more mentally focused, had more successful marriages, and enjoyed a greater sense of well-being.
From the article:
“While positive emotion tends to broaden thought, negative emotion tends to narrow it and hold back development….The findings of Dr Keltner and his colleagues, published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, are among the first to show that differences in the extent to which people express emotion may be stable throughout their lives and dictate personal and social success.”
Something that most people take for granted until it’s compromised.
Christopher Peterson, Ph.D of the University of Michigan, who has studied optimism’s link to health for over twenty years, shows optimistic people have a stronger immune system than their negative counterparts. This may be due to their tendency to take better care of themselves.
Choose to be happy now and you’ll have more days of good health to enjoy.
Once you get everything you want, you will still be subject to life’s highs and lows. If you haven’t learned to enjoy the little things, your well-being will parallel your life’s circumstances. Every time something goes wrong, you’ll feel deeply unhappy (as opposed to disappointed, but determined to make the best of things).
Think about the things that fill you with the most joy—spending time with your pets, listening to the rain, and running on the beach, for example. Focus on those things right now, and let them brighten your day. That way, no matter what changes, you’ll have a variety of simple pleasures to help you through.
I used to be obsessed with being perfect. If I wasn’t the best at something, I couldn’t sleep at night. Becoming great never felt as good as I imagined it would because there was always room to be better. I was constantly dissatisfied and disappointed in myself.
I now look at the things I do as opportunities to get better from one day to the next. It’s more satisfying to set and meet an attainable goal, like focusing better and writing an extra article tomorrow, than it is to obsess about perfection, stressing because I’m not a world-famous author.
By focusing on small improvements and mini-goals, you’ll naturally move yourself toward your larger dreams. And you’ll respect the way you’re doing things.
You may think life needs to change dramatically for you to be the person you want to be. That you can’t be giving unless you make more money. Or you can’t be adventurous until you sell your house. The truth is, you can be those things at any point in time.
So you don’t have money to share. Be generous with your compassion, and listen when your friends have problems. So your house hasn’t sold, pinning you in one place. Create adventure in your day by trying new things and introducing yourself to new people.
You never know when your nows will run out, so ask yourself, “How can I be that person I want to be in this moment?”
Though we all have different lists of dreams and goals, for most of us this is at the forefront: the possibility of living a meaningful life that affects other people for the better.
Happiness is a moment-to-moment choice, one that many have a hard time making. Other people will notice if you make that choice. And you will motivate them to do the same. As the research above indicates, this motivation has a substantial impact on their health and future happiness.
I know this isn’t your usual reasons-to-be-happy post. It didn’t start or end with “count your blessings” and I didn’t delve into your relationships or good fortune. There’s a very good reason for that.
I don’t think happiness is so much about what you have. What you have changes; your “blessings” evolve. Happiness is about how you interpret what’s in front of you. How proud you are of the way you live your life. How willing you are to enjoy simple pleasures, even if things aren’t perfect
What is the best way to live life?
Enjoy, enjoy and enjoy. You are here in this world for a short period of time. Therefore, you must enjoy each and every single moment of your life. If you don’t want to enjoy your life then you are no more a living person.
Don’t deprive yourself of your God given right to enjoy life. Dance with the rhythm of your life. Life is worth living!
Get up early in the morning. Go for a swift walk. Enjoy listening to the chattering of birds. Enjoy looking at the beautiful colorful flowers. Do some workout/stretching in the nearby park. Fill your lungs with pollution free fresh air. Isn’t it all exciting and enjoyable.
Enjoy your breakfast. Breakfast is the most important meal of the day so your breakfast must include a variety of nourishing food such as fruit, juice, milk, bread, cereals, egg, jam, jelly, honey, dried nuts, tea, coffee etc.
Enjoy your work. Start your work by saying hello to everyone in the office. Pass some positive remarks about your colleagues. Enjoy talking to your clients, colleagues, friends and family members. Make every effort to complete your work in time.
Enjoy every single bite of your lunch. Don’t eat in a haste. Eat in a tension-free and stress-free atmosphere. Don’t eat in a haste. Eat the kind of food that is light on stomach but quite nourishing so that you get the much needed physical as well as emotional energy, during the day.
After satisfactorily finishing your work, it’s now time to leave office and enjoy. Enjoy your leisure time in the manner you wish to enjoy by involving yourself in activities like reading, writing, studying, swimming, boating, dancing, visiting friends, learning new skills, playing outdoors, playing indoors, watching TV, watching movies, listening to your favorite music, enjoying food in your favorite restaurant, going on long drive, etc.
If you need extra money then you can engage yourself in some part-time business or job in your spare time. Working for extra hours will bring some more money to your pocket and more joy to your life.
Don’t engage yourself in activities that can bring problems to your life. Don’t invite trouble. Live a disease-free, smoke-free, stress-free and drugs-free life. Don’t involve yourself in any criminal activities and don’t do anything that is illegal or immoral.
Difficult times in life come and go but keep your spirits high even in the worst type of crisis. Face challenges of life with courage and a positive state of mind. Take lessons from your past mistakes but don’t feel guilty. Laugh at silly things and enjoy life. Laughter is the best medicine.
It is my own experience that you get the best kind of enjoyment when you help those who are helpless and look towards you for help. I personally feel great excited when I am able to help such people. There is nothing more enjoyable than enabling other people enjoy their lives. Enjoy your own life and let others enjoy theirs.
You will not live for ever, so till you are alive, enjoy every moment of your life from the core of your heart.
Don’t Compare your life to others. There is no comparison between the Sun and the Moon. They shine when it’s their time….
Who are you
You are caught up in the mayhem of the modern world, the never ending Ferris Wheel of the Corporate World and/or running your own business, constantly striving for perfection – you are struggling to fit everything into your day and are trying your best to emit the ‘I’ve got it all under control, i’m handling it fine’ image whilst struggling to do everything, please everyone and uphold your values around the work that you do whilst hitting those targets. The Swan analogy fits you perfectly, working really REALLY hard under the surface whilst trying to maintain the image of gliding over the surface.
You feel a sense of ‘manicness’ and ‘stress’ about not being in control, along with a sense of ‘but I should be able to do it all, everyone else does’ and just not feeling like you can, and then feeling guilty and putting pressure on yourself endlessly.
What’s Your Issues Tend To Be
Time is your biggest issue, then not feeling in control of how you react to others actions when they impact you and your world. Because you are trying to please everyone, and help everyone in your life and work, you take others actions, struggles & words to heart as you go through your day. You are just trying to make sure everyone else is ok & happy – often putting you happiness & wellbeing at the bottom of the list, putting everyone else in your life’s happiness first.
You struggle to find a moment to release all your fears, worries and anger during your day as you are just so busy worrying about everyone else – when all you really want to do is find a little time for you.
What You Need Right Now
You need easy, go to ways to help you find time, to create that moment just for you during your day.
You want to learn fast acting, effective tools that can you can implement yourself naturally & holistically to reduce stress, feel happier and help to lighten your load daily, helping you live a happier, healthier life along with helping those around you, those you love and care for with their daily struggles.
You want permission from those around you to focus on you sometimes
You want a ‘Fast Track’way to switch off your mind, so that you can create a moment of pure tranquility in your day. A sense of inner peace & an ability to take care of you in the mayhem of your world. To create time and space to look within every day to create & call upon an Inner strength, a calmness, a radiance from your soul enabling you to face the world utterly rejuvenated from the inside out. You want to feel a greater sense of control around how you respond to situations that life throws at you, a freedom of mind that you haven’t experienced in a long time, and all of this needs to happen in a short space of time, as time is your biggest issue!
How can we stay happy when there’s too much change and uncertainty? Are there ways to bounce back and thrive if everyday life and work is getting us down? The answer is to cultivate yourself like a garden, and grow your own wellbeing by learning from natural ecosystems.
The times we’re in are tough: it’s clear that we need new approaches and models to thrive in all this. Natural happiness is a simple, practical approach which can help in your personal life, and your work. It will show you how to cultivate your own human nature, and tend yourself like a garden: deepen your roots, and grow fruitfully through all kinds of weather.
Love and happiness may not actually originate in the heart, but they are good for it. For example, a 2005 paper found that happiness predicts lower heart rate and blood pressure. In the study, participants rated their happiness over 30 times in one day and then again three years later. The initially happiest participants had a lower heart rate on follow-up (about six beats slower per minute), and the happiest participants during the follow-up had better blood pressure.
Research has also uncovered a link between happiness and another measure of heart health: heart rate variability, which refers to the time interval between heartbeats and is associated with risk for various diseases. In a 2008 study, researchers monitored 76 patients suspected to have coronary artery disease. Was happiness linked to healthier hearts even among people who might have heart problems? It seemed so: The participants who rated themselves as happiest on the day their hearts were tested had a healthier pattern of heart rate variability on that day.
Over time, these effects can add up to serious differences in heart health. In a 2010 study, researchers invited nearly 2,000 Canadians into the lab to talk about their anger and stress at work. Observers rated them on a scale of one to five for the extent to which they expressed positive emotions like joy, happiness, excitement, enthusiasm, and contentment. Ten years later, the researchers checked in with the participants to see how they were doing—and it turned out that the happier ones were less likely to have developed coronary heart disease. In fact, for each one-point increase in positive emotions they had expressed, their heart disease risk was 22 percent lower.
Do you know a grumpy person who always seems to be getting sick? That may be no coincidence: Research is now finding a link between happiness and a stronger immune system.
In a 2003 experiment, 350 adults volunteered to get exposed to the common cold (don’t worry, they were well-compensated). Before exposure, researchers called them six times in two weeks and asked how much they had experienced nine positive emotions—such as feeling energetic, pleased, and calm—that day. After five days in quarantine, the participants with the most positive emotions were less likely to have developed a cold.
Some of the same researchers wanted to investigate why happier people might be less susceptible to sickness, so in a 2006 study they gave 81 graduate students the hepatitis B vaccine. After receiving the first two doses, participants rated themselves on those same nine positive emotions. The ones who were high in positive emotion were nearly twice as likely to have a high antibody response to the vaccine—a sign of a robust immune system. Instead of merely affecting symptoms, happiness seemed to be literally working on a cellular level.
A much earlier experiment found that immune system activity in the same individual goes up and down depending on their happiness. For two months, 30 male dental students took pills containing a harmless blood protein from rabbits, which causes an immune response in humans. They also rated whether they had experienced various positive moods that day. On days when they were happier, participants had a better immune response, as measured by the presence of an antibody in their saliva that defends against foreign substances.
Stress is not only upsetting on a psychological level but also triggers biological changes in our hormones and blood pressure. Happiness seems to temper these effects, or at least help us recover more quickly.
In the study mentioned above, where participants rated their happiness more than 30 times in a day, researchers also found associations between happiness and stress. The happiest participants had 23 percent lower levels of the stress hormone cortisol than the least happy, and another indicator of stress—the level of a blood-clotting protein that increases after stress—was 12 times lower.
Happiness also seems to carry benefits even when stress is inevitable. In a 2009 study, some diabolically cruel researchers decided to stress out psychology students and see how they reacted. The students were led to a soundproof chamber, where they first answered questions indicating whether they generally felt 10 feelings like enthusiasm or pride. Then came their worst nightmare: They had to answer an exceedingly difficult statistics question while being videotaped, and they were told that their professor would evaluate their response. Throughout the process, their heart was measured with an electrocardiogram (EKG) machine and a blood pressure monitor. In the wake of such stress, the hearts of the happiest students recovered most quickly.
Unhappiness can be painful—literally.
A 2001 study asked participants to rate their recent experience of positive emotions, then (five weeks later) how much they had experienced negative symptoms like muscle strain, dizziness, and heartburn since the study began. People who reported the highest levels of positive emotion at the beginning actually became healthier over the course of the study, and ended up healthier than their unhappy counterparts. The fact that their health improved over five weeks (and the health of the unhappiest participants declined) suggests that the results aren’t merely evidence of people in a good mood giving rosier ratings of their health than people in a bad mood.
A 2005 study suggests that positive emotion also mitigates pain in the context of disease. Women with arthritis and chronic pain rated themselves weekly on positive emotions like interest, enthusiasm, and inspiration for about three months. Over the course of the study, those with higher ratings overall were less likely to experience increases in pain.
Happiness is associated with improvements in more severe, long-term conditions as well, not just shorter-term aches and pains.
In a 2008 study of nearly 10,000 Australians, participants who reported being happy and satisfied with life most or all of the time were about 1.5 times less likely to have long-term health conditions (like chronic pain and serious vision problems) two years later. Another study in the same year found that women with breast cancer recalled being less happy and optimistic before their diagnosis than women without breast cancer, suggesting that happiness and optimism may be protective against the disease.
As adults become elderly, another condition that often afflicts them is frailty, which is characterized by impaired strength, endurance, and balance and puts them at risk of disability and death. In a 2004 study, over 1,550 Mexican Americans ages 65 and older rated how much self-esteem, hope, happiness, and enjoyment they felt over the past week. After seven years, the participants with more positive emotion ratings were less likely to be frail. Some of the same researchers also found that happier elderly people (by the same measure of positive emotion) were less likely to have a stroke in the subsequent six years; this was particularly true for men.
In the end, the ultimate health indicator might be longevity—and here, especially, happiness comes into play. In perhaps the most famous study of happiness and longevity, the life expectancy of Catholic nuns was linked to the amount of positive emotion they expressed in an autobiographical essay they wrote upon entering their convent decades earlier, typically in their 20s. Researchers combed through these writing samples for expressions of feelings like amusement, contentment, gratitude, and love. In the end, the happiest-seeming nuns lived a whopping 7-10 years longer than the least happy.
You don’t have to be a nun to experience the life-extending benefits of happiness, though. In a 2011 study, almost 4,000 English adults ages 52-79 reported how happy, excited, and content they were multiple times in a single day. Here, happier people were 35 percent less likely to die over the course of about five years than their unhappier counterparts.
These two studies both measured specific positive emotions, but overall satisfaction with one’s life—another major indicator of happiness—is also linked to longevity. A 2010 study followed almost 7,000 people from California’s Alameda County for nearly three decades, finding that the people who were more satisfied with life at the beginning were less likely to die during the course of the study.
While happiness can lengthen our lives, it can’t perform miracles. There’s some evidence that the link between happiness and longevity doesn’t extend to the ill—or at least not to the very ill.
A 2005 meta-analysis, aggregating the results of other studies on health and happiness, speculates that experiencing positive emotion is helpful in diseases with a long timeline but could actually be harmful in late-stage disease. The authors cite studies showing that positive emotion lowers the risk of death in people with diabetes and AIDS, but actually increases the risk in people with metastatic breast cancer, early-stage melanoma, and end-stage kidney disease. That increased risk might be due to the fact that happier people underreport their symptoms and don’t get the right treatment, or take worse care of themselves because they are overly optimistic.
When you’re frustrated and you’re having trouble solving some problem that confronts you, what you need is a good laugh. Laughter unfreezes a “stuck” brain. Think of humor as a lubricant that allows the wheels — your thought processes — to once again move toward a solution. The mechanism that underlies effective problem-solving is creativity, which is your brain’s ability to come up with novel, unique answers to life’s many challenges
Happiness is so important to us, both as individuals and as a world, primarily because happiness is really all there is. As human beings, although we possess cognitive abilities and are highly “thought” oriented, the quality of our lives is ultimately ENTIRELY determined by our emotions.
KEEP YOURSELF HAPPY 